A Legendary Performer

Okay, I'm not Elvis, but I am a certified ham. This page is so that I can show off some of the pictures from my greatest live shows. You may have to wait awhile for the graphics.

Just to change the pace, I'm not starting with my theme song but with one I often do at karaoke. If you want a song other than the one playing, scroll down and select one, which will pre-empt the others.

As for my themesong, you may ask: "Does he have his OWN song?" Well, as Orson Welles says in Citizen Kane:

"Everyone who's anyone in this town has a song."

Here I am sharing a typically intense moment
with the Great Buddha of Kamakura in 1990.

Here I'm playing "Burn-Out" in a 1988 Stevenson Junior High
Production written by Sue Kellstrom pictured here.

I was telling Clinton, in 1995, that he needs to start transferring
DoDDs teachers. He's saying "I feel your pain."

Here I make one last attempt (1997) to prove to my brother
that I really dance better than John Travolta.

Let's Dance.

It's a little known fact that I'm quite the basketball player. At our last faculty student game I set a record--for most misses in a game. Here we are suited up at Yokota High School (1992) with nowhere to go.

Here (1991) I'm giving some traditional Japanese drummers a lesson
on how it's done in drum corps. Note how the sticks are held.

Here is the entire Fruit clan circa 1994, two nephews ago: my mother and father, brother-in-law Steve Simmons, Debbie Simmons, Little Ted Simmons, David, Diane, and I.

Sometimes people think it's easy to write my books. Here I am writing in Istanbul in 1997 with my laptop wired to the only available plug- in the bathroom.

Here I am, with mike, rapping away in our parody show in Los Angeles about "The Kids Who Do Work" in our 1989 production of "Detention Day."

Here I'm in Singapore (1991) talking to some traditional Chinese actors about how to properly play "The Tiger" in their play. After my performance, they actually did ask me if I was professional.

Here's the Music Man quartet showing off our chops on "Lida Rose."
From left to right Mr. McKay, Mr. Levi, me, and Mr. Olinzock.

Here 76 Trombones.

Milton Berle made his name this way, I think. This is opposite
dress day at Yokota High School back in 1994.

This is a bit more typical pose. Here, I'm worrying in the midst
of yet another tough debate season at YHS circa 1997.

Frankly, Scarlett didn't give a d*&&^ This is me hamming it up in Charleston
with a Southern (actually a South Indian) belle circa 1994.

Take no prisoners!

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