Washington D.C.


A Detroit song, but a good question...



You really learn something about government when you go to a session of the Senate and find five Senators present as the t.v. cameras blaze away recording sound bits. It's sort of amazes me it works as well as it does.



So this tour mixes some serious sites with some not so serious comments to liven things up.


Here's the White House in the usual fog.

Bill what's that about your knowing
every girl in town? Oops, I'm sorry.

From a distance, it starts to make more sense.

This is where they take our money.

This is the Supreme Court Building, site
of many a future John Grisham novel.

This is John Marshall. Appointed to the (then powerless) Court, he made
it into something. One year, he personally wrote EVERY court decision.

This is the Library of Congress. It looks
deserted as very few Congressman can read.

This rejoinder from John Madison rests on the wall of the Library. Translation: "Don't get taken every time."

The government bought this fountain in 1878 at a bargain price.
Would that Lockheed had similar sales on aircraft!

The Department offers no tours, not even a display, yet its bureaucrats wonder
why Congress wants to dispose of this department. Does it really serve a purpose?

This little capsule actually took one of the astronauts up on a Gemini mission. As Alan Shephard said: "Span in a can."

They stopped building the Washington Monument twice because Congress couldn't find the money to fund it.

The Lincoln Memorial and the Mall make for a nice view.

Lincoln claimed he needed to violate
the Constitution in order to save it.

A good view from the Lincoln Memorial's steps.

This is either the Vietnam Memorial or a
scene from another Oliver Stone movie.

The Vietnam Wall honors the dead of that conflict.

My then Senator, Miss Feinstein, hosts a
"meet your folks from back home breakfast."

The National Gallery displays paintings like this Jackson Pollack. Isn't this picture upside down?

No, I will not leave until you tell me how you got this painting out of my mother's living room.

It says "Grant's Tomb," but who's really buried in there?

Alexander Hamilton walks out of the Treasury Building. He advocated various steps to make the economy strong. Politicians feared he wanted to follow Washington into the White House. Remember the "native birth" clause in the qualifications listed for United States presidents?

Reagan used to worship in this small church. They piped up the organ to cover the snoring.

This statue of Jackson acheived fame for the horse's pose and balance. It looks rather like a grasshopper to me.

The DAR ( The Daughter's of the American Revolution) Building: I found out my relative,
Conant, never rose above the rank of buck private, but he did fight against the British.

Mr. Clinton, what's this about you
and a young intern? Wait, come back.

The tourist's view of the White House: In the Sixties, protestors liked to march in front in this lawn.

Jackie O. wrote the tour guide for this building.

In the National Musuem, a PDP 6, the machine that, in the hands of nerds, launched the computer revolution.

At Arlington Cemetary, the Kennedy Memorial.

A tomb honoring a dead commander of the
"Iron Brigade," hopefully not Mike West.

They confiscated the site for Arlington, Lee's mansion, during the Civil War as a way of getting back at Lee for filling that same cemetary with war dead.

The tomb of the Unknown Soldier.

"Did you shave today? No, I mean your head."

This honors those who died in a helicopter crash on the way to Iran to attempt to free the hostages. Had they made it, the government might've drafted me to fight against the Iranians. With my eyesite, that would've been dangerous.

This honors the Marine Corps and lists a whole lot of battles. Unfortunately, the rest of the country doesn't even know about half of them. This shows how many times the president "called out the Marines" instead of trying to talk Congress into declaring a war.

Even though I worked for them, they wouldn't let me
tour here either. You probably notice a pattern.

When Smithsonian donated the "Castle" and its collection to the US Government in his will, no one had a clue what to do with it. I'm not sure they know now either.

Okay, I didn't even try to tour here.

I tried to see a show here. Price were so expensive
I felt like someone had shot me in the head also.

"Alright, alright, let's go. He's not jogging today."

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